When you try your best

Dear future hubster,
please find below a non-exhaustive, non-linear, non-coherent, not-entirely-coincidental list of things that I would qualify as little wins:
When the coach of the coach asks you what other sports you do. And then tells you to do the advanced version of the exercise.
When your kiné - whom you're not-so-secretly crushing on - laughs at something clever you say.
When you run anything over 5k for the first time since you've been dumped.
When you first make it to 72 hours without crying. And then to a week.
When you go on holidays hoping for interesting work to come back to, and then two weeks later there are lots of interesting requests in your inbox.
When you get to do something your way because nobody knows any better - or because they trust that your way is good.
When you call into a meeting with somebody for the first time and they are funny and competent and on top of their game and and friendly and relatable.
When you find out that people know you for running a tight ship but also for being a safe person.
When people remember you.
When your niece - any of your nieces - looks like she doesn't think you're totally cringe. Maybe sometimes she even thinks you're kinda cool.
When you almost fall off your rollerblades but then you do five minutes of contemporary ballet and stay on your feet. Wheels.
When your heart is heavy with grief but a small human chooses you to tell about their dinner and their passé composé tests and summer camps. And then ask you what a workshop is.
When you're sad beyond measure and the universe decides to send something so out of the ordinary your way that it only feels normal.
When, after what felt like an eternity, you can look beyond your pain and see the softness in yourself. Defiant, quiet.
When you still cry every day but can feel the sun on your skin. And see your tan the next day.
When you (over)do all the exercises because you need to feel that you have control over something and then you start feeling stronger.
When after yoga class you thank your body - the same one somebody someday called gorgeous.
When the days are getting shorter but they also come with spectacular sunsets.
When you feel an odd sense of calm and suddenly know that you can play the long game.
When you know that one day the sun will come out.